I asked for peace, I got some.
This weekend went beautifully. We had the family Christmas on Saturday and all had a great time meeting our newest member of the family. The night was not spent speaking about baby stuff as I had feared. We talked about all different stuff. The men all gathered in the living room and spoke about politics and other unpleasantries. I took a group of women to the sunroom and we laughed about the men!
Sunday we went to the new wee one's baptism. It was a beautiful ceremony and I welled up with pride as I thought of my responsibility in her life to teach her the ways of our Savior. I pray I'm equal to the task.
I had not shed a tear until yesterday when I found a picture of my Daddy holding me as a baby. Mainly the tear was of remembrance and happiness. I saw how he looked at me and it wasn't much differently than in other pictures. He always had such a sense of pride and joy when he looked at me. I pray that God blesses us in 2009 with an opportunity to share that joy of a child with my Angel.
With God's help, I was able to not once think about us and our infertility, but to focus on the joy that surrounded us. I couldn't ask for anything more.
Thank you for all of your comments. They do help me to realize that I'm not the only one going through this. I'm not the only one hurting. I think as January nears, I am really afraid that the 6 embies in the freezer are our last hope and I'm so afraid of failure. This is a viscious cycle. I think I run through every emotion every time. Thanks for your patience and listening to my rambling.
Merry Christmas to ALL!