Isaiah 40:31

"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall walk and not be weary, they shall run and not faint." Isaiah 40:31

Thursday, February 12, 2009

The day before...

Tomorrow I go in for my second beta. I'm amazed I've been able to hold on for this long. It is so hard to try to be level headed after so much disappointment and anguish.
I'm not sure if its the pn vitamin or what, but I've had terrible tummy upsets for days. I've tried taking my meds on a modified schedule throughout the day, and nothing has helped. Then a friend told me that she knew a lady that had "the D word" her whole pregnancy. NICE! Boy was I thrilled to hear that. But I'll take it. Its annoying, but as long as I don't get dehydrated, I think its okay, Right?
I've had this serious craving for cottage cheese. Angel was so sweet and got me 2 whole containers of the incredibly specific type that I like. I almost cried when I saw it in the fridge last night. AND he made me one of my favorite meals, one that he doesn't particularly enjoy, Swiss Steak. It was heavenly. I haven't been able to eat a lot at one time, but lets just say I made myself miserable last night. I slept so well!!
I've got mixed emotions that ebb and flow like the tide. Some times I will allow myself to get excited about things and just say, "God's got this, let him handle it". Then other times, I snatch it back and begin to worry again. I'm guessing that I won't quit worrying until ... welll... I die! I was going to say, when they turn 18. Nope. When they graduate college? Nope. When they get married? nope. So this just teaches me the HARD WAY that I've got to learn to deal with my worry. Let it go and quit snatching it back.
I will update tomorrow with beta #2 numbers. Who knows when I will hear from them. But I'll be over here, turning blue holding my breath.

9 comments:

Soapchick said...

Praying for an awesome beta Hollie!!! One more day! You can do it!!

Patricia said...

I pray you get great news tomorrow! I'm glad you're getting lots of support at home, too. It's time to spoil yourself and let others take care of you.

Chelle said...

Hollie, I am holding my breath too! I am on pins and needles! I will be checking your blog every minute that I can tomorrow!

((BIG BETA HUG!!)) :D

Kellie said...

I'm crossing everything I've got that you get good news! (And I'm double jointed, so that's a lot of things!)

Hollie said...

I hope this is it for you Hollie!!! Best of luck- I'll be checking back tomorrow, so post as soon as you hear!!!! I'm praying for you!

Cassandra said...

Congrats on beta #1, and best wishes for #2 tomorrow!

Chelle said...

...still on pins and needles. Hoping everything is okay...

~Hollie said...

Believe me, I'm about to PUKE! I just looked at the clock AGAIN and am freaking out here!!
My heart is pounding and I'm afraid to go to the bathroom because I don't know if my cell phone will pick up in there! UGHHHHH

Chelle said...

Hang in there... It will be any minute... I can FEEL IT. Sending good beta vibes. Good thoughts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Can you feel em?