1st- I have a terrible sore throat. Started a tickle last night, now full blown, feeling bad, sore throat that will probably have an accompanying fever soon.
2nd- I worked this weekend for a couple hours both days. I am terribly selfish with my weekend time and I feel robbed. So two hours of work along with 1 hour + of driving (takes 30 min one way) makes Hollie a bummed girl. Sorta felt like I spun my wheels all weekend, not getting either anything accomplished or did anything I wanted to do. I'm selfish. DB (Dear Boss-lady) has been more than wonderful to me and so super supportive. I can give her a little teensie weensie bit of my time for her to put up with all my life junk that keeps me from doing my actual job. Maybe its just that I'm starting to feel worse with this cold/whatever ailment I have.
3rd- Friend posed a question to me that has been on the brain lately too, just got me REALLY thinking after she said it. What about switching Dr's? Sounds easy, right? WRONG! There are only like 3 groups in the entire state. Two of which are extremely far from where I am, which poses a practicality problem. But WHAT IF a different dr makes THE difference? I have compared my dr's recommendations with that of other IFers and found her to be on the same page with others around the country. Also, the practice I see has 4 drs in it. All somewhat pioneers in different technologies related to ART. After I had been seeing them for a couple years, she started saying things like, "We talked about ___, We think ___" So she is talking with the other drs about my case. So really, its like having 4 drs, right? I like the staff well enough. I mainly see folks at the satellite office closer to my house. They are great. The big office, 2.5 hours away, where the BIG DEAL stuff happens and the dr is located, well its a big office. Although, the longer I go, the more people I become acquainted with. I don't know. Definitely going to have to think on this one. Any input?
4th- Life is just fragile. We get reminded of this when we see news headlines, or catch snippets on the TV. Also, sometimes, it hits home and someone close to us has a freak occurrence that you just wouldn't think could,would,should happen.
5th-I watched this movie with Angel the other night, "A smile like yours". Yeah, so I set myself up for that one. Dreams come true, yada yada. But what actually made Angel and I burst into laughter at the same time was the Ma..ster?bato_rium. How funny! Well we have a new name now for the "room". I think it was good for us to laugh about it, together. And, after the movie was finished, I said, I'm sorry that we have to do this for our dream of parenthood. He said, its just part of it. In Angel-ese that means, he has accepted it and thats our life. Sometimes, I think I havent fully accepted that its OUR LIFE!
This is how my mind works. Bouncing from one thing to another. Really overthinking things a lot. I say to myself, STOP OVERTHINKING IT! Yeah, not happening. Do they make a pill for that?